What would you do if your parents told you not only that your boyfriend was going to propose to you but also when he was going to propose? Would you be excited and thankful that they let this secret slip, or would you be upset at them for spoiling the surprise?

The woman in today’s story is upset at her parents, and now that they’re planning the wedding, she’s even more upset.

Let’s read all the details.

AITAH for telling my mom “I’m used to it” after my parents ruined the surprise of my engagement and the wedding dress?

I (27F) am getting married in September 2025.

I’m in a long distance relationship. My partner lives in England and I’m in the US.

We’re lucky enough that I work remote and visit about 3 times a year for six weeks at a time, and he visits me in the US about four times a year for once a week.

The proposal was supposed to be a surprise.

When he was planning to propose, he had asked my parents blessing in March 2024.

My parents had “assumed” that I would know when he was proposing, and my dad had told me in a conversation that following week he was proposing in December 2024.

As you could imagine, I was upset.

My mother invalidated my feelings and said I was making it a big deal and being stupid for not assuming it was going to be during Christmas because that’s when both of our families were together.

She didn’t assume it would be at Christmas.

My argument is that while I could have had a hunch, I didn’t want to be told when it was, and basically could have gone practically a whole year wondering excitedly when it would be.

For all I know, he could’ve proposed before that, and Christmas we would have had an engagement party.

Anyway, basically my dad apologized but my mom has stood firm on saying I’m dramatic for being upset.

She is not enjoying planning this wedding.

Since then, more things have gone wrong, and has started to leave me just so sad about wedding planning.

None of this has been a good experience and I’ve started to feel like it’s a chore.

Flash forward to today, my partner is visiting (just for one week.) and we’re all sitting on the couch in the living room.

This time it’s her mom who messed up.

My mom randomly turns to me and goes, “Have you picked up your veil from the bridal store yet?” Right in front of him.

And then my partner smiles and goes, oh, you’re wearing a veil?

And I just got super frustrated.

There are only two surprises in a wedding— the engagement and the dress. And both of them have been handled so carelessly.

Her mom kind of apologized.

So I turned to my mom and said, can you please not mention anything about the dress? Not the shoes, nothing. I don’t want him knowing anything.

She rolls her eyes, walks around, and about 10 minutes later gives a half-hearted apology just saying, “Sorry, OP.”

And I replied, “it’s fine. I’m used to it at this point.”

And now she’s gone back and locked herself in the room.

So I guess, AITA for being upset?

What is wrong with this woman’s parents? You don’t tell her that her boyfriend is going to propose to her before he proposes, and you don’t talk about the dress when he’s around either.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

She should stop talking to her mom about the wedding.

Here’s another vote for cutting off the mother from info about the wedding.

“Info diet” is a good way of phrasing it!

Nobody thinks OP should talk to her mom about the wedding.

This mom cannot keep a secret!

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.